- Show and tell - model good behaviors
- Be consistent in behavior and rule setting / enforcement
- Set limits - clear & consistent rules kids can follow / understand
- Give consequences / follow-up / don't give in
- Hear them out - let them talk / explain, watch for patterns of misbehavior
- Give attention - reinforce good behaviors / discourage bad
- Praise good behavior
- Can choose to ignore bad behavior (so long as no one is in danger), see if it goes away
- Plan ahead - if you know situations may bring out bad behavior
- Redirect bad behavior - find something to distract them
- Time out - 1 min / yr, or 'go to time out and come back when ready'
- Use logical consequences - ex if misuses toy, take away for a time
- Avoid power struggles - except when child potentially in physical danger
- Take parent time out if can't handle self
- Use discipline to teach, not punish
- View misbehavior as a sign of a problem - child wants something
How to use Time Out for Children
Time out is intended to remove child from overstimulating behavior, not to punish them.
How to Discipline a Child
Purpose of disciple is to teach, not to punish
Effective discipline does not instill shame, negative guilt, a sense of abandonment or a loss of trust. Instead, it instills a sense of greater trust between the child and the parent. source
3-5 yr olds:
- Approval and praise are powerful motivators for good behavior
- Lectures don't work well
Harsh verbal discipline leads to misbehavior / depression
Avoid shaming, name calling, making child feel bad about themselves. source
Types of Parenting
According to American Mental Health Association:
Authoritative: An authoritative parent has clear expectations and consequences and is affectionate toward their child. The authoritative parent allows for flexibility and collaborative problem solving with the child when dealing with behavioral challenges. This is the most effective form of parenting.
Authoritarian: An authoritarian parent has clear expectations and consequences, but shows little affection toward their child. The parent may say things like, "because I'm the Mommy, that's why." This is a less effective form of parenting.
Permissive: A permissive parent shows lots of affection toward their child but provides little discipline. This is a less effective form of parenting.